New Year, New You?

Over the past number of weeks, I've seen an increasing number of major changes in dynamics of friends relationships. And by major changes, I mean - make ups, break ups or engagements. I suppose between Christmas and the New Year people do very much assess where they are in their life's and the changes that they want to make for a better year ahead. In my own opinion, I think that people should stop making unrealistic New Years Resolutions that are broken by the 3rd week of January and instead vow to take things up that will improve their lifestyle. So whether that is, take up a 'good deed for the day' policy, take up more exercise, take up eating more healthy, I believe that when you put a positive slant, you in turn become more positive as an individual. If you begin to tell yourself that you can't have this, can't have that and can't have the other, it's a negative action and a form of self deprivation that won't last. Ultimately, it's like the long written book, The Secret, whereby for every positive action, there is a positive reaction.

For friends that have either recently become single or have been single for a while, I've seen them become increasingly negative with regard to meeting a partner. Many of them saying that 'there are NO men', or 'there are no gentlemen', or maybe 'there are just no normal men left'. Now, I will be the very first to say, that available normal gentlemen are very thin on the ground. And this isn't a case of women being fussy with their standards, it is more a fact due to our change our economic climate and the huge numbers that have emigrated. But I would disagree with the powerful exaggerated statement that there are NO men available.

A number of months ago, following on from my long standing research on dating and the minefield that it is, and after reading countless books on rules and no rules, there was one particular book, that did change my way of thinking. That book, written by a MAN, so coming from a mans mindset changed the way I looked at dating. It was refreshing not to read a book written by a female telling you - not to call, not to text back straight away, to refuse the first date, the play it cool and to effectively make a man jump through every perceivable hoop like a circus animal. The book that I'm talking about is called "Get the Guy" by Matthew Hussey. Yes, there are countless books that you could read over and over but I honestly felt that reading from a mans perspective and how they think was the best possible angle to look at dating.

Even last week, a friend said that she had been messaged by a few guys on the dating app Tinder, but point blank refused to message them back because 'she's an old fashioned kinda gal'. This book will tell you that if you live in that mindset, you will be left an old fashioned kinda gal. His believe is, that if you want something, you go get it. Fate and destiny are a very rare occurrence and in reality YOU are the master of your own destiny. The same can be said for love as with career.... Did your employer walk up to you at the traffic lights and said that you looked like a good representative for the company? Of course not, you got in there, applied for the role and by God sold yourself at the interview process. Looking for a partner is the same. So ladies, if it's  meant to be, it's up to me - go get the guy!